hols-over

my holidays are almost reaching its end. and tomorrow i'm going back to jitra, starting all those busy days again. i don't feel like working coz i'm still in holiday mood. time just flies too fast. so today i'm just gonna pack up my stuff, grab everything that i can and leave. there was something happened at home during this holiday, makes me even hard to leave. and i don't want to mention what was that about.
hope everything will be just fine. wish everyone luck in dealing with their lives.

better off anyway

no matter where this story goes, it's always been me who's hurt. i know someone else feels the same, but i just don't care anymore. i wanna be free. i wanna fly like a bird. it has been a long time and i'm wondering why is it always me. i'm not too stupid to realize what's going on around me or what people do around me. i'm growing up and as i get older, i'm getting confused with myself, who i want to be and with whom i want to be with. i don't know who the hell i am anymore. i just lost my way for now. i know i just wanna be me and little changes won't be hurt. i have to set an aim in my head and being a little overprotective might help me a bit. it's not like i'm build up blocks around me, i just don't wanna get hurt anymore. i'm going to stay away and no more turn around after that. instead of crying every night, i'm going to have a blast in my life. i want to live it to the fullest, like people always said. so that's it, i wanted to move on. i wanted it so much that i even wanted to jump off from a 100 storeys building. fuck everything that hurts me. fuck everyone who broke my heart. i am not going to be the same. this one i promise u. i'm going off and never come back into your life. i'm getting enough and i just can't take it anymore. i don't care what people said or what they think when reading this. i know they will not understand but believe me, this is not some crap that i wrote to get some cheap shit of attention. this is what my heart wants to say. and from this day on, i hope the new but not too much me is reborn.