Waiting for "Love Letter"

I'm waiting for my 'love letter' to arrive safely in my mail box. I am now currently at home, guyang kaki doing nothing. It almost drives me insane. I am so bored. Mo jalan but duit tiada. No job no money laa. Sienz. I was wondering about looking for a temporary job before but yeah, talk but no action won't bring you anywhere. So my 'love letter', please come faster. I need youuuu. =.='

Sabah Youth Day 3 is just around the corner. This time it will be held at Tambunan on the 20th of August until 24th of August this year. It is my first time joining SYD so yaa I am excited. :) Hopefully everything will be just fine.

Since I'm at home only, my daily routines are all the same. Wake up in the morning, cleaning the house, cooking lunch, part time nursery for my 4 younger brothers, eat, shower, making dinner, online all day etc. Short word, every day is the same! Oh my english. Oh yes, I'm watching Oh My English on TVIQ. It's a very good learning programme actually. Don't forget to watch OME on TVIQ every Sunday 10.30a.m. lolzz.

Baaa ok. Babaii~~

bored hols

Currently at home. Will be back to college this Wednesday for my 1 week induction starting on this 8th of June. Hope everything will run smoothly without any problems. After that will come back to Sabah on the 17th of June. 3 years has passed. How time flies. And then if God's will, I will start my working life soon. Yaiii. I don't think I'm ready for this. =.='

There's nothing much to do at home. Besides taking care of my jajal brothers, I only spent my whole day playing poker. It drives me insane when lose too much chips. fml. There's nothing to do, really. huhaii.

And I don't have anything else to update. Oh ya, I passed my final exam. Thank God. :)
Am going to play poker back. Take care fellas. :D

formative's exam tretetettttt~

Exam for formative already over and ya, i'm glad! ekekeke. Now only have to finish my research, print out everything, be ready for practical exam and last going back to college for final exam! o.m.g. I am almost at the end of my journey in my study at KSKB Sungai Buloh as a Health Inspector trainee. So far, i feel okay. But the truth is, i don't have any courage to go back there to college. I'm scared. I leave the rest in God's hands. Ok, that's all the updates for now. See ya!

p/s: I am a big fan of Christina Grimmie for now! LOL. xD

final semester break

It's March. March in 2012 is already here not long ago. It's 7th of March 2012. How time flies. I'm in the middle of my semester break and it's only three of us left at hostel. The rest were going back to hometown, well some of them did. Leaving just me, Ema and Kak As. But we're having fun, in our own ways though. Haha. Today we are planning to hit the mall, and the k-box as well. Ekeke. And buying some groceries. Not much needed during holiday. :)

And as the holiday goes on, I haven't started any of my works yet. Still sitting playing some games, online till midnight, watching movies and dramas, and not a single work is done. I should start later. Probably tomorrow. No idea. :P

I should get some sleep now. It's already late. :)

born.to.die

Feet don't fail me now
Take me to the finish line
All my heart, it breaks every step that I take
But I'm hoping that the gates,
They'll tell me that you're mine
Walking through the city streets
Is it by mistake or design?
I feel so alone on a Friday night
Can you make it feel like home, if I tell you you're mine
It's like I told you honey

Don't make me sad, don't make me cry
Sometimes love is not enough and the road gets tough
I don't know why
Keep making me laugh,
Let's go get high
The road is long, we carry on
Try to have fun in the meantime

Come and take a walk on the wild side
Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain
You like your girls insane
Choose your last words
This is the last time
Cause you and I, we were born to die

Lost but now I am found
I can see but once I was blind
I was so confused as a little child
Tried to take what I could get
Scared that I couldn't find
All the answers, honey

the moment, it's ours.

It has been a long time
Since I first had this feeling
And then there u were
Smiling at me
Making me feel alive once again
U helped me to get through everything that I need to let go
U healed my wound, and even helped to remove the scars
I thought the world was going to end
And everything will be gone in a blink of an eye
I was afraid to open up my eyes
But u hold my hand and said "It's ok, I'm here for u."
And I believe in u
I believe that u will take care of me, take care of what's left of me
Never thought that the scars will bleed again
I guess I was never put on this earth to take chances with u
But don't misunderstand
I was so happy at its best when I'm with u
Every moment spent together, short but meaningful
I'll treasure it forever.

i'ts you, it's you, it's all for you.

This is just some... I don't know. Lately I've been feeling so uneasy with all these feelings that keep playing around me. I try really hard to make it go away but somehow it keeps coming back and fuck I hate it. I really do. FML.

When you're in love with someone, I guess the only thing you want for that person is to let them have their own happiness, besides loving them too much. You can love someone but you can't force someone to love you in return, in case they don't. So, maybe instead of keep forcing them to love you, maybe you can help them to find their own happiness, even though that happiness doesn't include you. Is that so? Is that so? Really? How I hate to make things like that. I hate it but it doesn't mean I didn't helped without the honesty.

I'll try to make you happy even I know this is too hard for me. And I want you to know, I do it with all my heart, coz I love you, even though I'm in pain. You don't have any idea how hurt and miserable I am right now. But I'm trying for you, I'm trying for you so you can live happily. I know this is actually a choice, I know I can leave you because I am so hurt seeing you with somebody else but I chose to stay. I chose the hard way instead. I chose not to leave you and help you to get through all the things that you want to get rid of. Am I stupid? Am I?

You know what? You're in my dreams, and I'm happy. Just thinking of you can make me cry easily for now.

But I promise myself not to cry after this. I will be happy for you. Giving you all those advices, telling you not to cry when I'm actually crying at the same time. I promise I'll try real hard not to cry while giving you any advices anymore. I'll promise to be strong and be someone that you can lean on to.

And I know you are hoping that I'll find someone new later, but for now can I just choose to be with you? Not in any kind of relationship, I just wanna be with you. Not anything special, simply being with you. Maybe people will find that this is ridiculous, why would wanna be with someone that never wanted you in their lives? But I made my decision. I don't care.

And that's how things are going to be after this. Until I come up to something better later, this is how it gonna be. I'm gonna stick around to make your day. I'm going to put a smile on your face when you're feeling down. I promise. And above all this, I wish you nothing but happiness dear. I love you Apple Pie. :)